Boom Boom for Captaincy

I wish I had known of this earlier. Then I would not have wasted half of my life trying to develop a good reputation, and wasted countless hours trying to inculcate within myself a spirit of honesty and propriety behaviour.

I am not sure how successful I have been at achieving my aims, but I do feel that whatever success I have had has been an utter and complete waste of time.

I mean, I should have just chewed on a cricket ball and done so in the public eye with no less than two dozen cameras zoomed in me and people watching all over the world.

And I should have tried my level best to embarrass myself and my country, and perhaps I too would have been rewarded by something as lucrative and prestigious as the captaincy of the Pakistan cricket team.

Oh man, I wish my parents only knew that they were leading me down the path of destruction and despair when they told me that honesty was the best policy and that I should always try to conduct myself in a respectable and dignified manner.

I mean the proof is right there for all of us to see. Shahid Afridi is currently the front runner for the post of captaincy and I am pretty sure it is not his performance with the bat that has landed him this coveted position. The statistics are not exactly mind-boggling. He is known for his big hitting, but not known for consistency and reliability.

However, his performances with the ball have always been a little bit better, and he has himself said that he prefers to be selected as a bowler. Well, now he has proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that he truly does prefer balls.

But the issue here is more than just Shahid Afridi and his becoming captain of a team that is full of talented individuals with great cricketing skills. The sad part is that this group of players excels at some things other than cricket, like arrogance, indiscipline and the lack of national pride.

The issue also is the standards upon which hangs the balance of judging success and failure.

There is no doubting Shahid Afridi's talent, but can one really say that he is a bigger asset than Shane Warne ever was for Australia, or Freddie Flintoff for England.

yet Shane Warne, tipped by many to be the next Aussie skipper had to forever fore-go that ambition because of his indiscretions with the opposite sex, indiscretions of the extra-marital kind. They were private matters, yet the Australian Board felt they reflected wrongly on his character, especially in context of his future role as skipper of the team.

And Freddie Flintoff was vice-captain as well when he fell off his Pedalo into the Caribbean during a late night drunken excursion which was well beyond curfew as well. And with that tumble he let slip forever any chance of ever leading the England Test side. Again, there was no disrepute for the country involved in that, he was not breaking any laws, he was not cheating ior trying to cheat. But it was considered an act of indiscipline and insubordination and behavior unbecoming of one who someday plans on leading the country's cricket team.

Perhaps, to some degree it still is a game of gentlemen, but not in Pakistan.

On a side note, maybe we are all wrong and just out to get Afridi. Maybe the poor chap was just extremely nervous and wanted to chew his nails and accidentally nipped the ball in the process. We are so cruel to the innocent boy! Shame on us!

As for Mr Ijaz Butt, who could think of no one else as captain of the national cricket team, I am just too disappointed to say anything.